Today i read a such beautiful note here, and i must put it in blog to be able to read it repeatedly :’) here it is…
I was chatting with a girlfriend the other day. She filled me in on her latest love conquests and had me up to speed on the news of the dating world. My six-year married mommy brain has apparently erased the exciting dating part of my memories entirely and now I am just going to have to live vicariously through my girlfriend. It is a refreshing getaway from the usual mommy business, I tell you.
After telling me all about how Mr. Right Now is potentially Mr. Right, she asked me the eternal dating question: should she choose passion over comfort or comfort over passion?
I remember thinking about this very question before marrying my Mr. Right. I remember some of more passionate, mind-blowing relationships I had before he came along – the glamorous ones, complete with fireworks – and the dramatic breakups that went with it. It seemed to me that passion was ignited by friction, instability, infatuation. It was intense and rocky. And then I met him. He became my friend. There was no love-at-first-sight, no fireworks, no dancing in the moonlight, no beating hearts, failing breaths. He came into my life like Simpsons clouds on a clear blue sky. He made everything in my world more pretty. It was easy to be with him. Easy, comfortable. It was softer and more nurturing.
Of course it’s not impossible to have any passion with comfort or any comfort with passion. It’s just that these two just don’t naturally co-exist easily. Comfort may not be as exciting as passion, but I believe that it will last longer. And so, because to marry is not a decision that is made for the next six months but one that will last for the next thirty years or more, we might want to choose the one that doesn’t usually dissipate in less than two years.
This is what I told her. Choose the one who makes you feel loved and welcome even when you are a mess. Choose the one who can make you laugh away that crazy stomach bug. Choose the one that reminds you that you’re at home.
Thanks for the enlightment